I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize