You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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