I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
