Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
