Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Randomize
