Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
