fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
