I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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