the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize
