I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
it was like having sex with a tree stump
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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