quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize