kristin has been a bad kristin
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
