i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize