I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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