We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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