I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
