I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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