He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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