best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
