Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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