big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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