my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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