Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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