haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Randomize