marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
