I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
