So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize