we have officially lost it.
I want to have your abortion
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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