I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
