its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
