drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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