I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
