guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
My brain says no but my pants say off.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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