Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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