Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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