it was like eating out sand paper
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
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