You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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