Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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