After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
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