maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
