woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
