Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
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