evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Holy sore nipples Batman
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
