i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize