somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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