Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
