you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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