So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
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