Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
