Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
