Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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