i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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