He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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